It’s OK to be weird (and the best people usually are).

In case no one told you, it’s OK to be weird (and the best people usually are).

Being weird doesn’t mean everyone will like you. But what’s the point of fitting in if you sacrifice your real self to do it? What’s the point of fitting in when it still doesn’t guarantee that everyone will like you?

And what’s the point of being liked when you are being liked for pretending to be someone or something you’re not?

Be your authentic self and you will attract people into your life who will like you for being you.

And then you can stop pretending to be “normal” and simply be comfortable with who you really are.

masks-she-had-blue-skin-and-so-did-he-by-shel-silverstein-200“Masks” by Shel Silverstein

She had blue skin.
And so did he.
He kept it hid
And so did she.
They searched for blue
Their whole life through,
Then passed right by –
And never knew.

[ And let me be clear, celebrating your weirdness doesn't mean being disagreeable. It doesn't mean completely disregarding people's personal comfort or disrespecting individuals or customs or the environment. And it doesn't mean allowing yourself to be totally socially inept. Quite the opposite.

Even if you don't want to conform, it is important to conduct yourself in a way that is compatible with the society in which you find yourself.

Eccentricities can be good. And being quirky can be good. But if "being yourself" means you're an assclown -- try to be someone more agreeable. ]

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From the comments:

Jackie: I’ve been told I’m weird since I was in my late 20s. I’m now 63 working on being totally myself before my birthday next month! Weird is wonderful! Weird is wild, wicked, wise, real, delightful, devilish, roguish, reliably funny, and so many other things. Why would anyone aspire to “normalcy”? How flipping boring, don’t you agree?

Zero: I do agree. I love the unique things about people that make them interesting.

Of course, not everyone’s “weirdness” is compatible with everyone else’s “weirdness”, but it’s still so much better to live life authentically than it is to pretend to be something you’re not — or be caught up in trying to be liked for things that just aren’t a part of your genuine self.

To live that way is to live a lie.

Jackie: Tried living the lie. Hated it. Decided to be me. Then learned how to be me. Scares the crap out of many folks. Makes me giggle, giddy, goofy, and best of all weird because there is no concentration on “fitting in” or being “normal.”

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Running from safety

Last night someone basically expressed to me that the way I’ve chosen to live on my journey “doesn’t inspire confidence” (or security).

And certainly, on some levels, I can see that. Sometimes I’m not so confident about it myself. Sometimes I doubt myself and my decisions (although much less than I used to).

Just yesterday I jokingly confessed to often not feeling as if I have any idea what I’m doing. But that’s not really a joke, is it?

Running from safety and comfort is scary. It’s weird. It’s not “normal” behavior.

OMG. I’m not normal. I’ve made a mistake. All of this is for nothing. It’s worthless if no one sees the value in it.

So while I’ve been thinking that over this morning, I received this email out of the blue from Russia (excerpt):

“… you’re great at ‘explaining’ stuff in a simple and neat way. I’m really-really grateful to you. I admire and (if I can be:) ) proud of you. Decisions you made, roads you drove and walked, your past and present – by all these I can say (I’m sure) that you’re on the right way. Keep it up) And let the Light be with you)…”

Maybe I don’t need to inspire confidence in everyone who crosses my path. Maybe it’s OK to be “weird”. Maybe anything that has value to me or helps me grow as a person isn’t “worthless”. Maybe the only thing that matters is that I believe in what I’m doing and stand behind the decisions I’ve made. Without regret.

Balance to the universe restored.

Thank you.

And please, let this be a reminder, if you’re inspired to do so, never hesitate sending someone words of encouragement.

You never know when they might be having the sort of mental deliberation that your words are exactly what they needed to hear.

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‘Vulnerability is life’s great dare’

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“From calling a friend who’s experienced a terrible tragedy to starting your own business, from feeling terrified to experiencing liberation, vulnerability is life’s great dare. It’s life asking, “Are you all in? Can you value your own vulnerability as much as you value it in others?” Answering yes to these questions is not weakness: It’s courage beyond measure. It’s daring greatly.” — Brené Brown (Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead)

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Pushing through fear

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“Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the bigger underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.” — Susan Jeffers, Ph.D. (The Five Truths About Fear)

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The master of your destiny

People often know exactly what they need to do to get the results they want, but fail to start because they don’t want to put in the work or subject themselves to the discomfort necessary to get from where they are to where they want to be.

Don’t fall victim to your brain telling you that it doesn’t want to do something — that could benefit you or others — because it is challenging or uncomfortable.

Most things you think are difficult to do at the beginning get easier with repetition. Not because the task gets easier, but because you get better at it. Stronger.

Every challenge you face and overcome today helps provide you with the knowledge and strength necessary to overcome the challenges you face tomorrow.

You have it within you to be the master of your destiny by resolving to bravely face the challenges necessary to get the positive results you want in life.

But you must stop trying to cheat your way through life by looking — or waiting indefinitely — for the magic pill or shortcut that never comes.

Do what is necessary to get the results you desire, and the discomfort you feel at the beginning of your journey will greatly diminish — or go away completely — if you commit yourself to getting through it without giving up.

Don’t sacrifice the kind of life and health you deserve by catering to your short-term comfort over your long-term goals.

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